***Guest Appearance
Credits to:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3PT4nlVqTJ8&t=131s
“Private Money Explained: How to Raise Capital Without Chasing Investors with Jay Conner”
https://www.youtube.com/@ThePersonalSuccessPodcast
If you’ve ever wondered how to break free from the constraints of traditional real estate financing, the story behind Jay Conner’s transformative journey is bound to inspire. In this episode, together with Ryan Watts, Jay opens up about how a crisis forced him to discover a new path that ultimately became the cornerstone of his real estate and coaching business: private money.
Jay’s story starts not with triumph, but with a setback. In January 2009, after more than six years of success relying on local banks and mortgage companies for real estate investments, Jay received an unexpected call informing him that his lines of credit had been shut down. No warning, no explanation—just gone. Faced with this daunting challenge, Jay refused to become a victim; instead, he turned to his network and found the solution through a simple but powerful question: Who could help?
This led Jay to the world of private money, a concept he had never explored and that most people—even seasoned investors—often don’t understand. Unlike hard money, which is institutional in nature and involves brokers and underwriting, private money is sourced directly from individual investors. There are no brokers, no origination fees, and the relationship is built on trust and service.
Jay’s approach is fundamentally different from what most real estate “gurus” teach. He doesn’t believe in pitching deals or chasing funding. Instead, he emphasizes educating his network, sharing opportunities, and separating the conversation about investment from the specifics of any deal. This strategy allows people to see the value and security of real estate-backed private money lending without feeling pressured. Most of Jay’s private lenders had never heard of private money until he explained how it works—how they could earn competitive returns, backed by mortgages or deeds of trust, and enjoy security that typical stocks or funds couldn’t provide.
One of Jay’s insights is the myth that private money is only for the wealthy or well-connected. Instead, he built his lender base from ordinary people—retired teachers, civil service workers, even minors whose parents managed inherited funds. For Jay, it’s about diagnosing whether someone has a problem, like low returns or volatile investments, and then introducing them to a new solution. If an associate is happy with their return, Jay doesn’t push his opportunity, but if they express frustration, that’s where the conversation naturally turns toward private money.
The real benefit of Jay’s method isn’t just about financing deals—it’s about empowering others and fostering relationships based on trust and integrity. He coaches real estate investors across the country to adopt a service-first mindset, focusing on what they can do for others rather than simply on profits. This principle extends to his business model and his personal philosophy: “Enough is never enough when it’s not about you.” Success, in Jay’s view, comes from joy, happiness, and the impact you make serving others.
Jay’s coaching program has produced remarkable stories, helping people retire early, raise millions in private funding, and reclaim their lifestyle. The transformation is clear: private money enables fast closings, greater flexibility, and confidence—allowing investors to make offers knowing the funding is in place.
For newcomers, Jay offers practical resources such as his Curiosity Opener script and his book “Where to Get the Money Now,” making it easy for anyone to begin the journey. He encourages people to take action sooner rather than later, emphasizing mindset as the most important factor in getting started.
Jay Conner’s journey is proof that adversity can open doors to new opportunities. By sharing his servant’s heart and practical strategies, he’s demystifying private money and empowering everyday people to succeed in real estate investing. If you’re ready to shift your beliefs about money and explore new ways to fund your deals, Jay’s story is a powerful reminder: real estate is about people, service, and trust—and there’s always time to start.
10 Discussion Questions from this Episode:
- Jay Conner talks about the importance of trust and existing relationships when raising private money. How do you think prior relationships impact the success of securing private funding for real estate deals?
- After his line of credit was shut down in 2009, Jay Conner learned to take 100% responsibility for his response to difficult events. How do you apply the E + R = O (Event + Response = Outcome) formula in your own life or business challenges?
- Jay Conner emphasizes serving others and having a “servant’s heart” as a strategy for long-term success. In what ways can entrepreneurs or investors make service a core part of their business strategy?
- The episode distinguishes between private money and hard money. What are the primary differences, and why does Jay Conner advocate for private money over institutional sources?
- Discuss the mindset shift Jay Conner recommends for raising private money. Why is it important to see yourself as a teacher rather than a salesperson or a “pitcher” of deals?
- Jay Conner mentions that many private lenders are “ordinary people,” not just the wealthy or well-connected. How does this reframe common misconceptions about who can participate in private lending?
- How does Jay Conner’s approach of not pitching deals directly, but instead planting seeds and educating potential lenders, help build trust and credibility?
- According to Jay Conner, “there’s more money than there are deals.” What implications does this have for both new and experienced real estate investors?
- Jay Conner suggests that “enough is never enough when it’s not about you.” In what ways does having a purpose larger than personal gain influence one’s success in business and life?
- What were your biggest takeaways from Jay Conner’s stories of transformation among his students and coaching clients? How do these examples influence your perception of what’s possible with creative financing?
Fun facts that were revealed in the episode:
- Jay Conner once secured his first private lending deal by simply approaching a fellow church member after Bible study, resulting in $500,000 of investment—all without pitching or begging for money.
- Despite flipping over 500 houses, Jay Conner admits that none of his renovation projects ever came in exactly on budget, highlighting the unpredictable nature of real estate rehabs.
- Instead of using traditional bank financing, Jay Conner created a network of 47 private lenders, many of whom are ordinary people like retired schoolteachers and civil service workers, showing that private money investing is accessible to anyone, not just the wealthy or well-connected.
Timestamps:
00:00 Overcoming Crises With Private Money
04:00 Real Estate Coaching for Impact
06:26 Line of Credit Unexpectedly Closed
10:53 Discovering Private Money Alternatives
15:26 Who, Not How: A Journey
18:22 When Is Enough Enough?
22:27 Diagnosing Investment Opportunities
25:53 Wayne’s Interest Rate Inquiry
27:36 Profiting with Private Lending
31:28 Maximum Allowable Offer Formula
35:31 Fast Deals, Big Profits
39:15 Real Estate Success Stories
41:14 Curiosity Opener Script Free
43:44 Reflections on Genuine Connection
Connect With Jay Conner:
Private Money Academy Conference:
Free Report:
https://www.jayconner.com/MoneyReport
Join the Private Money Academy:
https://www.JayConner.com/trial/
Have you read Jay’s new book, Where to Get the Money Now?
It is available FREE (all you pay is the shipping and handling) at https://www.JayConner.com/Book
What is Private Money? Real Estate Investing with Jay Conner
http://www.JayConner.com/MoneyPodcast
Jay Conner is a proven real estate investment leader. Without using his own money or credit, Jay maximizes creative methods to buy and sell properties with profits averaging $67,000 per deal.
#RealEstate #RealEstateInvesting #RealEstateInvestingForBeginners #Foreclosures #FlippingHouses #PrivateMoney #RaisingPrivateMoney #JayConner
YouTube Channel
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Secrets to Getting Real Estate Deals Funded Without Begging or Selling
Jay Conner [00:00:00]:
It’s, it’s just so much easier to do business with people where you’ve, where the trust is already there. They already know you. They already trust you. They already like you. And I’ve got a lot of brand new real estate investors that have come into my world of coaching and raised private money without ever having done a deal. And one question that comes up is, well, who’s going to loan me money on real estate, and I’ve never done a deal. And the answer is, if you don’t pay your private lender, the property does.
Narrator [00:00:33]:
If you’re a real estate investor and are wondering how to raise and leverage private money to make more profit on every deal, then you’re in the right place. On Raising Private Money, we’ll speak with new and seasoned investors to dissect their deals and extract the best tips and strategies to help you get the money, because the money comes first. Now here’s your host, Jay Conner.
Ryan Watts [00:01:01]:
Today’s conversation is for anyone who’s ever hit that moment where your plan stops working, not because you failed, but because the world changed or the bank changed or the rules changed, and suddenly you’re staring at a problem you did not ask for with real consequences. My guest is Jay Conner, a real estate investor and teacher who built his entire business around one specific promise: you can fund real estate deals without begging, chasing, or pitching anyone. Jay’s story turns in 2009 when his line of credit gets shut down with zero warning, and he’s forced to decide what kind of man he’s going to be in the middle of a crisis. And you’ll hear how one question changed everything. Who do I know that can help me fix this? And from there, Jay walks us into the world of private money, what it is, what it is not, and how ordinary people can use retirement funds to earn strong returns backed by real estate without needing to be wealthy, famous, or well-connected. We also go deeper than tactics. We talk about trust, integrity, why enough is never enough when it’s not about you, and why service is not just a value, it’s a strategy that compounds. If you’ve ever thought money is the barrier, or this is too good to be true, or this is only for people who already have connections, this episode will challenge that.
Ryan Watts [00:02:14]:
Let’s get to it. Jay Conner, welcome to the podcast.
Jay Conner [00:02:16]:
Ryan, thank you so much for inviting me to come along and talk about what I’m so passionate about, that being private money for estate deals, how to get private money to fund your real estate deals without ever having to ask for money, chase, beg, or persuade. It’s very, very different than institutional money or borrowing money from banks or mortgage companies. And the reason I’m so excited about it is that since I started using private money to fund my real estate deals all the way back in 2009, I’ve never missed out on a deal for not having the money to do the deal. It’s the biggest, most important transformational strategy that I have employed and used in our real estate investing business. Can’t wait to share.
Ryan Watts [00:03:09]:
You have got quite a remarkable story. Who is Jay Conner, and what is his mission?
Jay Conner [00:03:13]:
Well, my mission is to make an impact and to give back. To as many real estate investors who are either already investing in real estate or want to invest in real estate, by sharing my experience, sharing my knowledge, as to what I have come to do. So my mission is to have two companies. So we have Heritage Investments of the Coast, LLC, which has been investing in single-family houses since 2003. So we make an impact in our local community by buying single-family houses. We renovate them, turn them into beautiful, brand new homes. And we’ve sold a bunch of homes on lease purchase or rent-to-own. So we help people own a home that ordinarily could not go to the local bank and get traditional financing.
Jay Conner [00:04:00]:
And then along with that complimentary, all the way back in 2011, we started the Conner Marketing Group, which is a coaching company, and its mission is to coach and to teach and inspire other either experienced real estate investors that have run out of money or new, new people that want to get into real estate investing and how to get the money part of it, you know, fixed. So everything we do comes from a servant’s heart. It’s all about making an impact, making a difference. And, I’ve been so blessed to be part of a transformation of so many real estate investors, thousands of real estate investors across the nation, ever since we set out on this endeavor to, you know, just share what we have learned and keep people, keep people from making such huge, expensive mistakes as I have. I was the most disorganized mess when I started. I lost hundreds and hundreds of thousands of dollars by making mistakes that I just didn’t know any better. So I just love sharing my experiences to serve others.
Ryan Watts [00:05:10]:
Well, I love that you say it comes from a service in someone’s heart. And I think there’s a connection between that attitude, that purpose, and the outcome. I don’t know. There’s no proof that I could come up with, but I just— strong intuition. But I wonder your story really, from what I know about your story, it really gets interesting about 2008 during the financial crisis, right? Where you sort of, you were always using like bank money to sort of run your business. And all of a sudden, the bank cut you off, and you were like, okay, what do I do now? I wonder what that was like for you to go through? Like, there was one Jay Conner who existed back then, right? Who’d you have to become to get through that?
Jay Conner [00:05:47]:
Well, I learned some very, very important lessons by going through that experience. I remember it just like it was yesterday. I was sitting at this very desk in January of 2009. My wife Carol Joy and I have been investing here in eastern North Carolina since 2003. The only thing I knew to do, Ryan, those first 6 years was either go to the local bank or go to a mortgage company and have lines of credit or apply for mortgages. That’s all I knew how to do to fund my deals. But everything changed very, very quickly. Everything changed in January of 2009.
Jay Conner [00:06:26]:
Called up my banker, where I had a line of credit. I’d had a line of credit there for real estate investing for 6 years. And I told him about 2 houses that I had under contract. To purchase, and I told him what the funding was required for the deals. And I knew what his underwriting was. And I learned like that over the telephone that my line of credit had been closed with no notice to me. I thought to myself, well, it sure would have been nice to know that before I’m out here negotiating deals, you know? And so I said to my banker, whose name is Steve. I said, Steve, what in the world are you telling me? Is my line of credit closed? I said, I got a great credit score.
Jay Conner [00:07:09]:
I’ve made my payments on time for 6 years. You funded— I mean, I’ve proven myself. You know that I’m going to make the payments. Why is the bank closing my line of credit? He says, ” Well, Jay, don’t you know there’s a global financial crisis going on right now? I said, no, I’m here in Eastern North Carolina doing business underneath a rock. I said, but you just gave me a financial crisis. I don’t have a way to fund these, these deals. So I hung up the phone, and I sat here for a moment, Ryan. And, you know, I had choices.
Jay Conner [00:07:41]:
I had choices. I could be a victim, go home, put my tail between my legs, and, you know, drink Cheetos, eat Cheetos all day long, and watch TV, or I could do something else. You know, what plays into this story, Ryan, is a formula that I learned from Jack Canfield. He wrote an amazing book a little over 10 years ago called The Success Principles and The Success Principles. Highly recommend the book. It’s got 65— Jack Canfield has identified 65 success principles in the book. And the very first success principle says this: take 100% responsibility for everything that happens in your life. And in that first chapter, he shares a formula, and the formula is E R O.
Jay Conner [00:08:32]:
And what those letters stand for is E is the event that happens in your life. Maybe you caused it, maybe you attracted it, maybe you had nothing to do with it, but there’s this event that happens in your life. The O stands— excuse me, the R stands for your response. E plus R, your response to the event, and that equals O, the outcome. A lot of people are walking around living with a different formula. A lot of people are walking around with E, the event, equals the outcome. They’re a victim. They can’t do anything about it.
Jay Conner [00:09:07]:
But the beautiful thing about this formula is you are 100% free to choose your response to whatever it is that happens in your life. So what was my response? It’s your response to the event that determines what you’re going to experience. So here was my response. Sat here at the desk for a little bit. After learning I had been shut down at the bank with no notice. And I asked myself a very, very important question. And the answer to this question— and this question can help anybody fix anything that’s going on in their life. I don’t care if it’s financial, personal, relationship, or career; it doesn’t matter.
Jay Conner [00:09:50]:
And here’s the question that I asked myself. You know, the power is in asking the right questions so you can get the right answers. So here’s the question I asked myself sitting here at this desk, right after I was cut off from the bank. And I asked myself, I said Jay, who do you know that can help fix your problem? Who do you know that can help you? And by the way, these people running around saying every problem’s an opportunity, I want to throw up. I did not have an opportunity. I had a problem. I had a problem. Now the problem became an opportunity.
Jay Conner [00:10:21]:
I wouldn’t be talking with you here today on your show unless I’d gone through this. But at that moment in time, it’s a problem. So when I asked myself that question, who do I know that can help me fix my problem? I immediately thought of Jeff Blankenship. Now, Jeff Blankenship’s a dear friend of mine and my wife, Carol Joy. We’ve known him. I knew him before he was married, and his wife, Megan. We know each other from Christian gospel singing groups and the church. And anyway, he was living in Greensboro, North Carolina, at the time that this happened, and I called him up.
Jay Conner [00:10:53]:
And I told him about my conversation with my banker, and Jeff said, ” Well, Jay, welcome to the club. And I said, I’m not sure I want to be a member of that club, but what club are you talking about? He said, ” Well, it’s the club of having the bank shut you down on your real estate investing deals. He said, ” My bank shut me down last week. I said, ” Well, Jeff, how are you going to fund your deals? And he said, well, have you ever heard of private money? I said, no. He said, ” Have you ever heard of self-directed IRA companies and how Individuals, ordinary people, can take the existing retirement funds that they’re not happy with, transfer them over to a self-directed IRA company with no tax penalty, and then loan that money out to us as real estate investors. And the interest we pay them is tax-deferred or tax-free. I said, Jeff, I don’t have a clue what you are talking about. What’s private money? He says, ” Well, I’m not sure.
Jay Conner [00:11:44]:
He says, but there’s this gentleman down in Jacksonville, Florida. By the name of Ron LeGrand, who says he can teach us about private money. I said, really? I said, ” Well, what is private money? Jeff says, I don’t know, but Ron LeGrand says we can get a lot of it really, really fast. I said, ” Okay. So that next month, February 2009, I will go to my very first real estate investing conference. I’d been in this business for 6 years, relying on my previous experience. Don’t do that, by the way, if you’re just starting in real estate investing. Get in a mastermind or get a coach who has walked the path.
Jay Conner [00:12:21]:
Don’t make that mistake that I made. And so I went to that conference, I learned about private money, and boy, did it open my mind. What I learned was 99.99% of people walking around think that when you go to borrow money, go to borrow money for anything, when you go to borrow money, whoever’s got the money makes the rules. That’s what most of us think. They think whoever’s got the money sets the term, the frequency of payment, the interest rate, and all that. Well, what I learned in this world of private money is, guess what? I’m not asking for a mortgage. I’m not filling out applications. I’m not getting on my hands and knees and begging, saying, please fund my deal.
Jay Conner [00:13:03]:
What am I doing? Instead of applying or asking for money, what am I doing? I am putting on my teacher hat, which says private money teacher, and I’m just going about my own network of people, people I go to church with, Rotary Club, Business Networking International, and I’m exposing them to this opportunity as to how they can earn high rates of return safely and securely, mortgaged-backed debt backed by the real estate. And I got 47 private lenders, Ryan. None of them ever heard of private money. None of them.
Jay Conner [00:13:41]:
Until I exposed them to it. As a teacher, I shared the opportunity with them without pitching any deals. See, that’s a big part of the secret sauce. We separate conversations. We never pitch deals, never pitch deals. We separate the conversation of teaching and sharing the opportunity, and how it works, how they’re protected, the interest rate, how they can get their money back in case of an emergency, etc., and then having a deal for them to fund. We don’t have to pitch that deal. I just called them up with the good news phone call. I can now put your money to work.
Jay Conner [00:14:14]:
I got a deal that you can invest in. So that is a backdrop and a foundation to this whole mindset. People ask me, they say, Jay, how do I get started raising money? I can tell you the first thing you need to do to raise money, you’ve got to own the real estate between your ears. And what I’m talking about is the mindset. We’re not chasing money. We’re offering to serve and give people high rates of return safely and securely in a way that they have never heard of.
Ryan Watts [00:14:42]:
So you’re sitting there, you get this news, and it’s kind of like, what do I do now? Jack Canfield comes to mind,d and you’re like, okay, I need to, I need to keep this equation in here. I need to respond accordingly. Right. I need to be responsible and sort of own this. And so you think of this, uh, your, uh, Blankenship, Mr. Blankenship. Well, I can’t remember his first name. And then he kind of introduces you to this idea.
Ryan Watts [00:15:03]:
Just hearing you talk about it right here, I don’t know. Now I’m feeling kind of silly. I’ve never heard of this before, like borrowing private money in this way. And then just thinking about it makes a lot of sense. It’s almost like it’s so obvious because I own real estate. It’s like, oh, well, it would be, you know, real estate. If it’s a mortgage, it’s, you know, it’s backed by the bank. So it’s fair, there’s a limit to the risk.
Ryan Watts [00:15:26]:
Right. And just having these conversations about people putting their money to work in that kind of environment just seems like, with the little bit that you told me, was like, wow. But I also love, and this came from another podcast where I talked to a gentleman, and he said he got to this point where he was just trying to take it on himself. And he said, okay, from now on, I’m not gonna, I’m gonna ask who, not how. And you really started your journey with that. You’re like, okay, I don’t know how I’ll do this. So I’m gonna have to ask for who. And you got introduced to this idea, and this has become kind of the heart of your work.
Ryan Watts [00:15:57]:
So I still have some work to do around money beliefs, right? And you’ve rehabbed more than 500 homes. Is that right?
Jay Conner [00:16:03]:
That’s right.
Ryan Watts [00:16:04]:
And completed over $118 million in transactions. So, and, and you enjoy 7 figures in profits each year and work 10 hours a week. So for those of us stuck behind the belief, right? And who are just like, ah, this is not possible for me. What belief about money changed first before your results began to? Was there anything you could point to?
Jay Conner [00:16:26]:
Sure. So first of all, I want to give credit to Dr. Benjamin Hardy for co-authoring the book with Dan Sullivan, Who Not How. And I didn’t even know that book existed until way after my story. In fact, I was blessed to meet Dr. Benjamin Hardy a couple of years ago, uh, at a conference. So he wrote that book and he also has written another book that came out a couple of years ago called Be Your Future Self Now, Be Your Future Self Now. It’s a great book by Dr.
Jay Conner [00:16:58]:
Benjamin Hardy. So I’m an avid follower of him. So, people have different beliefs about money. A lot of people think money’s evil. A lot of people mishear the Bible scripture. They think the Bible scripture says money is the root of all evil. Money’s not the root of all evil. Go back to your Bible.
Jay Conner [00:17:19]:
And read it one more time. The actual scripture says, ” The love of money is the root of all evil. Very big difference. And so money’s neutral. Money’s not good. Money’s not bad. Money likes to move around; it does not like to sit still. And so I think I can share with you, Ryan, and your audience, a belief I have about money and my belief about making money.
Jay Conner [00:17:45]:
A couple of years ago, I was riding down the road with a very good friend and, uh, he’s known what I’ve done, Carol Joy, and I’ve done for years in real estate investing. Back in 2011, we started our coaching company, coaching other real estate investors on how to get money without ever asking for money. And so we do a lot of traveling, do a lot of speaking in person, uh, on stages across the country. I do a lot of Zoom presentations. Et cetera. And so we’re riding down, my friend and I were riding down the road, and he asked a question just out of the blue. He said, Jay, he said, let me ask you a question. I said,” Okay.
Jay Conner [00:18:22]:
He said, ” When is enough enough? And I said, ” Well, I think I know what you mean, but really, what are you asking? He said, ” Well, I know you don’t have to be doing all that stuff you’re doing. You don’t have to be traveling all over the nation speaking and et cetera. And you know, you have a very successful real estate investing business. When is making enough money enough, making enough money? I said, ” Okay, I’m starting to get a little bit more clarity. And then he said, how do you reconcile the Bible scripture from the Apostle Paul that says be content in whatever station of life you are? I said, now I have total clarity in your question, and I have your answer as to when is enough. And I said, the answer is that ” enough is never enough when it’s not about you. You’ve got to answer the question, why are you doing what you’re doing? And if your focus is on other people, serving other people. I mean, the question comes down to what does the money allow you to do? Right.
Jay Conner [00:19:25]:
Um, and let me tell you, there’s no security in money because money can come, money can go. I don’t, I don’t care where you put it or, you know, what you do with it. So as long as your focus is on what you can do for other people, I mean, that’s our entire focus in our businesses. How, how can we serve the people that we’re buying houses from? All the houses that we buy from people have a problem. They wouldn’t be selling to us unless they had a problem. How can we help them? When it comes to selling houses, how can we serve those people? Our private lenders. One thing I didn’t understand, Ryan, when I started, is that the private lenders need us more than we need them because there’s more money than there are deals. I have a problem.
Jay Conner [00:20:08]:
I’ve got over $1 million, which I call just sitting on the shelf, ready to invest by private lenders, and they’re waiting for the next deal. Right. And so as long as that focus is on what you can do for the other person, enough is never enough. Keep serving.
Ryan Watts [00:20:23]:
I think that I hear the heart again, that servant heart there is that it’s, it’s sort of like this. It’s leading me to this principle because my mission here with this podcast is to understand,d li,ke what success means. It’s kind of the deepest human level. And there, there’s something that’s emerging from this that it’s about, it’s about using Actually, I think I can’t remember on which person I was talking to, but they said that there is a, your purpose is the best that you can give to others. And that’s sort of what I’m hearing you say is what, you know, is kind of what you found as far as purpose is.
Jay Conner [00:20:59]:
100%. Absolutely.
Narrator [00:21:01]:
Yeah.
Ryan Watts [00:21:02]:
That’s incredible. And I think that there is, like I said, I said this already, but I think there is a connection between that. And the success that you’re having. So, you know, my belief before doing any research with your work, Jay, was that private money is for the wealthy or well-connected. What is it? What’s up? That’s a myth, apparently, right?
Jay Conner [00:21:21]:
It is.
Ryan Watts [00:21:21]:
What do you wish the everyday person would stop believing about that statement?
Jay Conner [00:21:25]:
Right. So one myth or misunderstanding or misconception that people have about private money is that they think they gotta find rich people. Rich people. All 47 of my private lenders are just ordinary people, ordinary people. I’ve got, um, I got a retired schoolteacher. She and her husband, her husband’s now passed away. She and her husband taught public school for more than 30 years. They were in the retirement program the whole time.
Jay Conner [00:21:53]:
She has her entire retirement funding with me. She’s got over $1.2 million invested with me. Well, $300,000 of it right now. She’s— we’re looking for the next deal for her, but ordinary people, ordinary people. I’ve got, I’ve got retired civil service workers. I’ve got retired law enforcement people. I’ve got minors. I’ve got kids less than 18 years old who inherited money from their grandparents, and their parents are investing that money for the minors that they inherited from their grandparents.
Jay Conner [00:22:27]:
These are all ordinary people. So when you start conversations, no selling, begging, persuading, or chasing. It’s all about diagnosing. It’s all about diagnosing if they have a problem. Do they have investment capital and/or retirement funds that are not giving them a high rate of return safely and securely? You know, you can have a, you can have in the midst of a conversation with an associate, family member, friend, coworker, whoever. You can be saying, you know, by the way, are you investing in anything these days? And if so, what kind of rate of returns are you getting? Well, if they say they’re investing in XYZ and they’re getting 15%, then I’m going to say, that’s fantastic. Can you tell me about that? I’d love to get 15%. I’m not going to talk about my private money opportunity.
Jay Conner [00:23:12]:
I diagnosed that they don’t have a problem. Yeah, but if I ask that question and they say something effective, oh my lands, it’s horrible. You know, I’m only getting less than 3% in the local bank in a CD, or, you know, my retirement funds are all volatile. I just diagnosed that they have a problem. And then I go into the conversation of, well, that’s interesting. Let me tell you what I’ve got going on. I’m now paying insane high rates of return to my real estate private lenders, and they are getting 8 to 10%. On their returns.
Jay Conner [00:23:47]:
I just planted a seed without selling. I just sort of dropped it there. I just sort of dropped it there. I’ll tell you another great way I love to start conversations is what I call the indirect approach. And the indirect approach uses the magical phrase that is quote unquote, I need your help. So let me share a short story, if I may, Ryan, about how I got my first $500,000 in private money. No asking, no begging, no selling. It was, uh, I went to Bible study.
Jay Conner [00:24:18]:
Carol Joy and I went to Bible study on Wednesday night at 7:30, and I walked into the foyer. I was looking for a gentleman named Wayne. Wayne and I had known each other for some time, and I walked up to Wayne. I said, Wayne, I got something I want to talk with you about confidentially after Bible study. Would you have a few minutes? He said, ” Sure. So we had Bible study. And then we got together, we went down to the nursery, closed the door. Here’s exactly what I said to Wayne.
Jay Conner [00:24:46]:
I said, Wayne, you know everybody in this town. And he did. He was the original Zenith television dealer in Morehead City, North Carolina. Now, if you’re listening to this show and you don’t know what the Zenith or who the Zenith television dealer was, you’re too young to remember life. Before Walmart came to town. Yeah, before Walmart showed up, you bought your TV at the Zenith dealer. He sold it to you. He financed it.
Jay Conner [00:25:17]:
He’d come out to your house and repair your TV. That’s before you threw it in the trash can and just went and bought another one.
Ryan Watts [00:25:23]:
Yeah.
Jay Conner [00:25:24]:
Had Wayne sold a TV to everybody in this town? He put a TV, put a television in every room in the hospital, and was very involved in the Rotary Club. So that’s what I said to him. I said, Wayne, you know everybody in this town. And here’s the magic phrase. I said, Wayne, I need your help. I said, I have now opened up my real estate investing business by referral only to people that I know and trust. And I’m paying insane high rates of return to my private lenders and investors.
Jay Conner [00:25:53]:
Here’s what I need your help with, Wayne. When you run across somebody who’s complaining about the little bit of interest they can get in the local bank or the volatility of the stock market, would you refer them to me, and I’ll tell them about my opportunity? What do you think Wayne said? Wayne said, ” Well, Brother Jay, what you got going on there? What kind of interest rate are you paying? And I said, ” Well, Wayne, are you saying that you might be interested? He said, ” Well, I might be interested. I said, ” Why is that? He said, ” Well, we’re earning only 3% in the local bank. And that’s what it was in 2009, back to where it is now. And it’s coming back down. He said, ” We’re losing money in the stock market. He said, ” What kind of interest rate are you paying? I said, well, Wayne, that sort of depends on the deal. I said, what sounds high to you? He said, ” Well, we’re earning only 3% in the bank.
Jay Conner [00:26:45]:
He says, I don’t know, 5 or 6% maybe. I said, Wayne, I can’t pay you 5 or 6%, but I can pay you 8%. He said, ” Put me down for $250,000. So the next day, on Thursday, the next day I went to his and his wife’s home. And what did I do? I came along with my teacher hat on, private money teacher, meaning that’s my mindset. I’m just, I’m just sharing the program with them. And so I went over all the pieces of it. How are they protected? I’m not borrowing unsecured money.
Jay Conner [00:27:17]:
They’re getting a mortgage or a deed of trust to collateralize that note. They’re being named on the insurance policy as the mortgagee, another layer of protection. I’m not going to borrow more than 75% of the after-repaired value. I didn’t say 75% of the purchase price. I said 75% of the after-repaired value.
Ryan Watts [00:27:36]:
Yeah.
Jay Conner [00:27:36]:
That’s why I always bring home a big check when I buy. I take none of my own money to the closing table. I bring home $50,000 checks all the time when I purchase real estate. So anyway, I explained the program to them, how they’re protected, how I give a 90-day call option if they need their money back in case of emergency. And you know, Ryan, what’s interesting is that the $250,000 that Wayne mentioned on Wednesday night became $500,000 to invest after 2 cups of coffee. So that was our first private lender after I put my opportunity together. And how did that conversation start? It started with me saying, Wayne, I need your help. And guess what? After they became a private lender, they referred so many people to us by word of mouth from additional private lenders.
Jay Conner [00:28:25]:
So again, no chasing, no begging, all about serving. Yeah.
Ryan Watts [00:28:29]:
You know, you said in your work that there’s unlimited private money available. And I just wonder, why don’t more people take advantage of this? Is there any reason you see for that, or is it just, I don’t know?
Jay Conner [00:28:43]:
Well, they just don’t know about i,t, and they don’t have a need. They didn’t need to know about it. I learned about it because I had a need,d and I went to a very specific conference to learn about it. And so I never heard of private money. Now, bear in mind, when I say private money, I’m not talking about hard money. Hard money in the world of real estate investment is institutional money. Hard money is a broker of money that has gone out and raised private money for individuals to invest in the hard money lending fund, and then they turn around and lend it out. But again, it’s institutional money.
Jay Conner [00:29:23]:
They’re the underwriter; they’re setting the interest rate. They’re setting the length of the note, the frequency of payments, and all that. Private money is a one-on-one transaction with no broker involved. That’s why we never pay origination fees. I’ve never paid origination fees or points to my private lenders because there’s no broker in the middle to get paid an origination fee or a brokerage fee. So it’s just a very, very simple way to do business.
Ryan Watts [00:29:49]:
So what creates trust faster with people? Is it experience or? Integrity.
Jay Conner [00:29:56]:
So most of my private lenders, I already had a relationship with. Trust was already there. And so, then the other people that I’ve never met that are my private lenders, the bridge of the relationship was put in place by my private lenders referring me and them to know each other. So it’s just so much easier to do business with people where you’ve— where the trust is already there. They already know you. They already trust you. They already like you. And I’ve got a lot of brand new real estate investors that have come into my world of coaching and raised private money without ever having done a deal.
Jay Conner [00:30:36]:
And one question that comes up is, well, who’s going to loan me money on real estate, and I’ve never done a deal? And the answer is, if you don’t pay your private lender, the property does. So that’s why we’re not borrowing any kind of unsecured money. It’s all backed by the real estate that’s being bought.
Ryan Watts [00:30:55]:
Yeah. Wow. This is fascinating. I’ve got to ask, you know, my mind immediately goes to this, and I’m sure listeners are thinking about it. Have there been any failures or bad decisions that led to this happening? And I know you just mentioned that the great thing about this is you’re not borrowing any unsecured funds, so the bank could like pay them back, but is there any kind of story that comes to mind?
Jay Conner [00:31:16]:
Sure. Like I bought and sold, I flipped over 500 houses. Not one of them has come in on budget on the renovation.
Ryan Watts [00:31:24]:
Yeah. Yes.
Jay Conner [00:31:25]:
Not one.
Ryan Watts [00:31:26]:
Not one of them as well. Yeah.
Jay Conner [00:31:28]:
Has come in on budget. But the secret to protecting yourself, protecting your private lenders, is in your offer, in what you are buying. So Murphy lives in every house. Sometimes Murphy’s cousins and grandparents live in a house. And the unexpected shows up even when you do what you’re supposed to do and get a home inspection before you close on that deal. But there’s a formula that I use that’s called the maximum allowable offer. And as long as you follow this formula, you’re going to be protected, and your private lender is going to be protected. So the maximum allowable offer formula is when I’m going to rehab a house or renovate it and turn it, turning it into a brand new home, smelling new, looking good, all that, looking Fantastic.
Jay Conner [00:32:20]:
I take the after-repaired value that I get from my realtor. I’ve had the same two realtors for 20 years. From my realtor, get the after-repaired value. Now I’m going to multiply times 70% if the after-repaired value is under $300,000. If it’s over $300,000, I’m going to multiply times 80%. Then I’m going to subtract the estimated repairs, and then I want to subtract from that either $10,000 if the after-repaired value is under $300,000, or I’m gonna subtract $20,000 for the unexpected if the after-repaired value is over $300,000. And then that is the maximum offer that I’m gonna make when I’m paying all cash with private lending. Using that formula protects you and your private lender.
Jay Conner [00:33:06]:
It’s a conservative loan-to-value.
Ryan Watts [00:33:07]:
So are there, uh, there’s gotta be other companies that have sort of copycatted you, and it’s gotta be somewhat. If it works right, there’s gotta be sort of an industry that’s growing around this, right?
Jay Conner [00:33:18]:
Not really. Not really. Really, what is out there, mostly what’s out there in the industry are hard money lenders, hard money lenders. So I’m on a mission to get the word out. I’m on a mission. So I’ve had a couple of thousand real estate investors purchase my book, which is called Where to Get the Money Now. I’m gonna make it even better for your audience. I’m going to make it to where they even have to buy my book.
Jay Conner [00:33:41]:
I’m going to give your audience a gift to get them started here at the end of the show. But I’m on a mission of getting the word out, very— a lot of real estate investors hear about private money, but it’s like a mystery. It’s a mystique. It’s like, what is that? Right? So I don’t know anybody else who actually teaches and coaches the way I do.
Ryan Watts [00:34:05]:
Yeah.
Jay Conner [00:34:06]:
I mean, for example, one myth is that most real estate investors think they gotta pitch a deal. And you’ve probably heard that phrase, pitch a deal. And I tell you one thing that drives me crazy, Ryan, the guru will be on stage teaching to an audience of new real estate investors. And they’ll say something to this effect. They’ll say, ” Oh, just get the deal under contract. The money will show up. I wanna throw up. That’s the most stupid thing I’ve ever heard.
Jay Conner [00:34:34]:
I mean, it’s like, is there gonna be like a drone that flies over your house? Drops a bag of money on your front? Or they’ll say money finds good deals. Money finds good deals. Give me a break. Has money got legs? Is money like what, running around, you know, looking for good deals? No. That’s why I practice and preach, get the money lined up first. There’s always going to be deals. There’s always going to be deals. I mean, just think about how much more confident, how many more offers you will make when you know you got $500,000 or $1 million burning a hole in your pocket to go make offers, and you know exactly where the funding is going to take place.
Jay Conner [00:35:15]:
I make all of my offers. We can close in 7 days. 7 days. Money is going to be hard. Money is going to be 3 weeks. Traditional money, the local bank’s going to be 30 to 45 days. And here’s a writer downer: time kills deals.
Ryan Watts [00:35:31]:
Yeah.
Jay Conner [00:35:31]:
The more time that goes by between you negotiating a deal or talking to a potential seller and actually closing, the less likely you are to do the deal. And that’s why I’m going to share a big secret right here, why we get so many of our offers accepted. We’ll make the offer, and we’ll close in 7 days. Well, a lot of those owners are living in the house. They can’t be out of the house for 7 days or 14 days or maybe even 30 days. So we put in the offer, we’ll close in 7 days. You can stay in the house as long as you want for the time that we negotiate for free, 30 days, 60 days, or 90 days. And my average profits are $86,000.
Jay Conner [00:36:12]:
I don’t care if they stay in there for free for 90 days, man. They get half of their proceeds in 7 days. Half. They get the other half of their proceeds when they vacate. And we’ve even got it built in. If they don’t vacate in the agreed-upon time, then my real estate attorney sends the other half of their proceeds to the courthouse at the clerk of the court. And now they have to go beg the court to get their money. So I only had to do that a couple of times.
Jay Conner [00:36:38]:
So speed, speed, closing on deals very, very quickly is very, very important.
Ryan Watts [00:36:44]:
So would you introduce this to people? I mean, it’s just, it’s fascinating to me that, you know, this is number one. I’m thinking back to 2008, 2009. I had bought a house,e and I sort of flipped it, and then it was really hard to get funding from the bank. So I was just like, well, I guess I’m not doing that anymore. And I just didn’t do it. And I’m like, man, if I would’ve, if I would’ve known Jay Conner, my life could be very different now, you know, some 15 years later. Right.
Jay Conner [00:37:10]:
Just as I, because, well, the good news is his, the good news is history does not dictate your future. Yes.
Ryan Watts [00:37:18]:
Yeah.
Jay Conner [00:37:19]:
Right.
Ryan Watts [00:37:19]:
Exactly. Yeah. And so that’s, I can’t help but sit here and think that, but I just wonder what is the, what do you, in your experience, what is the resistance people have, if any?
Jay Conner [00:37:29]:
I don’t know. The resistance from the standpoint of the lender or the borrower?
Ryan Watts [00:37:34]:
I just, it’s just, if this is, it just seems like if you were introducing this, you know, somebody from being the lender, right, as the sort of investor, right? What causes them? I mean, you said you have, you work with 47 different lenders. Yeah. I mean, it just seems like it’s, I’ll just say it, Jay. It’s like, oh, it seems too good to be true. Jay, tell me what I don’t know. Yeah.
Jay Conner [00:37:55]:
You’re saying, does a lender ever think it’s too good to be true?
Ryan Watts [00:38:00]:
Yeah, essentially. Yeah.
Jay Conner [00:38:01]:
And the answer would be yes until they understand the security. So when they see the kind of profits that we’re making on deals, $86,000, that’s why we can pay our private lenders 8%. You borrow $200,000. Now that’s that’s 8% annual percentage rate. If I’m only using the money for 6 months or 9 months, then I’m only paying that prorated, you know, portion of interest. But everything gets very, very clear to them when they see and understand the security. This is not like a stock where you get a stock certificate. This is not like investing in a fund where you get a private placement memorandum.
Jay Conner [00:38:45]:
I mean, they’re getting a deed of trust in North Carolina. Most states call it a mortgage. That promissory note is collateralized. Collateralized, and that’s how they’re protected. And so if they don’t get paid, they get the property, and then they actually make more money than the interest they would earn. But they don’t want that. That’s why they want to be a passive investor. They just want to sit back and collect the money.
Ryan Watts [00:39:09]:
So Jay, I want to talk about your coaching program. What is it like for people, for real estate investors, to work with you?
Jay Conner [00:39:15]:
Well, I’ve been so blessed to have such big transformations in working with people. I’m thinking of, um, Eric and Erica Carmichael. They live in Mississippi. He was working for the railroad, and he was only in ike late 30s, mid-30s, but he wanted to become a real estate investor. He came to my live event, the Private Money Conference, and in 7 months of us starting to work together, he retired from the railroad at not even 40 years old, and became a full-time real estate investor in Poplarville, Mississippi. Population: 2,000 people. And, uh, now Eric and Erica, they’ve raised over $3 million in private money, never missing out on a deal. I think of Crystal Baker, uh, living in Virginia.
Jay Conner [00:40:03]:
She was an occupational therapist. She was overseeing multiple clinics. She was in her, I guess, early forties, very successful, making multiple six-figure incomes, but she had two young children. And she promised herself she’d never feed her young children fast food. And she found herself one night driving through fast food, feeding her kids because she’s working 12 hours a day. And she said, ” You know, you can be making a lot of money, but not having the lifestyle. She came to my live event. We started working together.
Jay Conner [00:40:36]:
Crystal now actually helps me coach our members of the community. She’s now got over $4 million, almost $5 million in private money. She’s running her own business. And so these, these stories and experiences from our members just make it, make it all worth it. Our Platinum Plus program is a full year of coaching and working together. We front-load the coaching with private money, but a great way for people to get started, as I mentioned a few minutes ago, a great way for people to get started is for me to just give your audience a gift, Ryan, if I can do that now.
Ryan Watts [00:41:13]:
Absolutely.
Jay Conner [00:41:14]:
That would bring them right into my world. So I just finished writing 11 different private money, million-dollar scripts. That’s one of the most common questions I get: What do I say? You know, how’s a conversation go without feeling like I’m chasing anybody? And so the first script in that collection I’d love to give to your audience is called the Curiosity Opener, the Curiosity Opener script. And your audience, y’all can download this, a PDF. You can download it for free at www.jayconner.com, and I’m an E-R, not an O-R, so J-A-Y-C-O-N-N-E-R.com/scripts, and that’s plural. And I think you’ll really love that curiosity opener script. And if you do, there are 10 other scripts that you can get very, very easily. And I’ll email after that some additional training materials for anyone who wants to get started in raising private money.
Jay Conner [00:42:13]:
www.JayConner.com/scripts.
Ryan Watts [00:42:16]:
Yeah. And Jay, that’ll be in the show notes too. And if you’re watching on YouTube, you’ll see it down below as well. I also wanted to point out another gift that you’re giving on your website is your 2021 book, Where to Get the Money Now, right? So you can get that at jconner.com/book-details, I believe.
Jay Conner [00:42:35]:
Yeah, actually, it’s even simpler than that. Just jconner.com/book. Joeburton.com/book. Yeah.
Ryan Watts [00:42:41]:
Perfect.
Jay Conner [00:42:41]:
Perfect.
Ryan Watts [00:42:42]:
So I just real quick, cause we have just a couple of minutes here. This is just so fascinating. I just wonder, I guess, thinking about the book, the book sort of came about 10 years after the coaching program started. How did the book come about, and what can people expect to find in the book?
Jay Conner [00:43:00]:
After a mentor of mine beat me on the head for about 7 or 8 years and said, Joe, you need to write a book. You need to write a book. You need to write a book. Yeah, I knew, I knew it was going to be painful, so I just finally got around to doing it. It took me over a year to finish it, but the book, Where to Get the Money Now, was long overdue. And yeah, I mean, people can pick it up on Amazon for $20, but, but don’t spend $20. You can go to jayConner.com/book, and I’ll autograph it for you. It’s actually, I mean, believe it or not, the post office is still in business.
Jay Conner [00:43:33]:
Can you believe? They actually keep going up on postage, but I’ll rush it to you, 3-day delivery, and the book is free. Just cover shipping,g and we’ll rush it out to you.
Ryan Watts [00:43:44]:
Well, this has just been an incredible conversation. I think anybody listening, I mean, there’s a— it feels hopeful, you know? And I think, Jay, I just want to say you do a great job of having the servant’s heart come out. You shared one thing that struck me about our conversation today. Is the number of names that you used? And it wasn’t that, I mean, you weren’t naming like celebrities or whatnot, but this suggests to me personal relationships with people, you know? And I think that really shines through genuinely in the way you share your story. So I just, as we wrap up here, I just wonder, is there something that I should have asked you that I didn’t? I mean, we could have gone so many places, but I wondered if there was anything that came to mind you wanted to leave the audience with.
Jay Conner [00:44:27]:
No, I’m glad to share my definition of success.
Ryan Watts [00:44:30]:
Yes, please.
Jay Conner [00:44:31]:
Since the name of your podcast is a personal success podcast. Yes. So I answer the question, ” What’s your definition of success, with a question. And here’s the question: to what degree, how truly, to what degree are you full of joy and happiness? Money’s not got anything directly to do with that, right? So if you’re not truly happy and joyous, guess what? E R O. The event is I’m not happy. The event is that I don’t have joy. Well, guess what? You get to choose your response to that, and you can change it. If I mean, life is too short not to be happy and not to be full of joy.
Jay Conner [00:45:15]:
And so, you know, dream big, fulfill your dream,m and go after it. If there’s anything I wish I had done sooner, it would have been taking more action sooner on what I really wanted to do. I didn’t start this journey of real estate investing until 2003. I had really wanted to do it 10 years earlier. So the question is, when would now be a good time to start doing what you want to do?
Ryan Watts [00:45:42]:
I could not think of a better way to wrap this up. Jay, thanks so much for your time. This has been incredible.
Jay Conner [00:45:47]:
Ryan, thank you so much for having me come along.
Ryan Watts [00:45:49]:
Absolutely.
Narrator [00:45:51]:
Are you feeling inspired by the knowledge you gained in this episode? Then head over to www.JayConner.com/MoneyGuide. That’s www.JayConner.com/MoneyGuide and download your free guide that shares 7 reasons why private money will skyrocket your real estate investing business right now. Again, that’s www.JayConner.com/MoneyGuide to get your free guide. We’ll see you next time on Raising Private Money with Jay Conner.